I have never claimed to have a “Martha Stewart” worthy home. I have a pile of clothes I keep meaning to box up and give away to charity on my closet floor. I have occasionally ate cereal out of a coffee mug when I have ignored the pile of dishes in my sink. And every few days I do a massive pick up of all the items I attempted to throw in my bathroom trash and missed the can by inches.
However, I do have my home only thirty minutes away from what I call “Sleepover Clean”. Yes, “Sleepover Clean”. It is as simple as it sounds. There is a certain standard of clean that I hold myself up to before I allow a one-night stand or a long-term partner to spend the night. And I am really wishing more of my darling butches would do the same. Because a dirty or smelly home is a big turn off. Trust me on this one.
It is really easy actually. I make sure that the basics are done weekly…taking out the trash, changing my bed linens, doing the dishes, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, etc. Then, I make sure whatever random messes I have going on at the moment can be cleaned or hidden in a matter of thirty minutes. I want my home to be presentable, comfortable, and inviting; but also look like it belongs to a successful adult (which I am) and not like a frat boy on autopilot (which I am not).
And because I am a overachiever of grand proportions, I also make sure there are spare (got to love samples!) toiletries items on hand and very accessible in my bathroom. I also stock my fridge with Red Bull and pantry with Luna Bars, because every great walk of shame should start with a breakfast of champions.
So get cracking my lovely butches, because I cant wait to fuck you…as soon as you change your sheets.