Femme Rebuttal

Dear Butch,

Please read the following post by one of my favorite bloggers, Butch Wonders, as a a prerequisite to my post this evening:

http://www.butchwonders.com/1/post/2013/04/how-to-translate-butchspeak.html

And now, a little “Femme Speak” (“If a Femme says” … “A Femme means”):

“Do I look okay?” … “I just spent hours on my hair, make up, nails, outfit and accessories.  Please notice the effort I spent to look good on your arm.”

“I guess you could invite your friends.” … “I really want a romantic night alone with JUST you and not with you AND your lez-bros.”

“Are you tired?” … “I just want to hit one more store, they are having a huge sale.”

“I was not checking her out.” … “I can’t believe I just got busted!”

“No, I don’t think she is handsome.” … “Her ass doesn’t fit in her jeans ass sweetly as yours does.”

“I just got home, give me a minute” … “Yes,I can’t wait to get naked you silly either.  However, I need a little time to unwind and de-stress before we fuck or else I will never be able to cum.”

“I’m not looking for a relationship right now.” … “I really enjoy being single and having one night stands.”

“I need a night out with the girls.” … “I am having doubts about us and am seeking advice from my friends.”

“I’m going to go take a drive.” … “I am having a hard time verbalizing my feelings so I am going to listen to Whitney Houston and cry in my vehicle.”

“I am fine.” … “I am so angry at you right now and trying so hard not to explode.”

“Your parents are amazing!” … “I am really hoping that someday they will be my in-laws.”

“It’s more romantic with the lights off.” … “I didn’t remember/bother to put on my cute underwear before we hopped into bed.”

“Can you open this jar?” … “I totally could do it myself, but I like the cocky smile you get on your face when I ask for your help.”

“We should probably get going soon.” … “My feet hurt in my new heels but I don’t want to admit it.”

“Are you going to wear that?” … “Please change, ASAP.”

“No really, I got it.” … “Stop doubting my abilities and intelligence.”

I hope you enjoyed, with a grain of sarcastic salt.

Love,

Femme

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