Time Limit

Dear Butch,

I am all for adventerous sex.  At the top of the ferris wheel, in the parking lot at work, or in the middle of a crowded concert … check, check, and check.

But, when there is a public restroom (by chance in a busy bar on a Saturday night) is not the time to spend twenty minutes in the spacious and well walled stall fucking your girlfriend who is too nervous to cum in fear that her ex-girlfriend is in line waiting to pee.  Especially when I have had one too many whisky gingers and have broke the seal.

Here is my theory on public bathroom sex, take it or leave it.  If you cannot achieve the deed within five minutes, evacuate the stall with a hard-on.  Let the sexual frustration travel through your body as you exit the washroom (please wash your hands, thanks) and continue to grind on the dance floor.  Bathrooms were built for a different type of release, obviously, and that needs to be taken in consideration when you are hogging a stall.  Respect those with tiny bladders, having wicked heavy periods, or just ate bad take out.

Not everyone is meant for a quickie.  I for, example, totally lose the focus I need to cum when I feel rushed.  The fear of getting caught doesn’t delay my orgasm, but the time constraints totally kill the mood for me.  However, my “T-Rex” (my boifriend’s name…yes…I am officially off the market…swooped up by a wonderful trans-man…hence boifriend spelt with an “I”) can explode in about 2.5 seconds after I touch him.  For him, quickie bathroom sex isn’t a big deal, for me it is, we just make it work.  And, it is okay to not have it work for you as well.  We all have our turn-ons and turn-offs.  Some people can fuck in busy bathrooms, some people can’t.

So next time you are pushing your lady into the restroom for a quick romp, set the timer for five minutes.  Ready, set, go!




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