Call Me…

Dear Butch,

Some dead white guy who I was forced to read several times over once compared names to roses.  As much as I detest this individual and his work, that in anthology form cost me well over one hundred dollars and weighed about fifty pounds, I have to give it to him … he was right about names.

Some couples have special bedroom names.  That may be the chest line I have ever written in the history of this blog, but I am going with it.

Whether it be Sir, Ma’am, Slut, Daddy, Mommy, Bad Girl, Naughty Boy, Master, Mistress, Slave, or (fill in the blank here).  These are all names that hold social and sexual stigma.  Assumptions about the name holder and name caller, with a strong dose of judgement usually attached.  Just because a woman is called “Sir” does not mean she wants to be a man.  Calling your partner “Mommy” in the bedroom does not mean you have mother issues or are into age play.  Wanting to be called “Lord of Darkness and Unicorns” is not an indication that the couple is into Dungeons and Dragons.   Having a given name between the sheets that is used on a regular bases is a carefully discussed and decided upon.  And, if that name (or a variation of it) is used in public is a whole new can of lube.  We may dance between sweet names for our partners, a mix of “Honey-Baby-Sweetie-Darling-Love” is tame and safe.  Calling your other half “Ass Whore” during sex is not as delicate as “Muffin”.

Is sex with a partner less kinky, intimate, or loving without a special name?  Hell to the fuck no.  A partner by any other name would fuck as fabulous.  But, if that is what you are into, scream it loud and proud.

Love,

Femme

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